Just got off the phone with SMF.  It was a pretty good, honest conversation I think.  We talked a little bit about the whole joke/insult thing, then ended up talking about this whatever-it-is we’re engaging in.  Acknowledged the weirdness of it.  We both admitted it was a little confusing and a little stressful and we’ve both thought about whether we should pull back to “just friends.”  Since the texts earlier today I felt like I’d be good to continue being FWB for at least a little while longer, but after talking for a while tonight it started to be clear that it was also causing him some trouble.  He said things like “I don’t want to say we should stop having sex…” — and I think I understand what he means by that.  It feels good, after all.  Why would we want to stop?  But he’s curious, and I am too, about whether we can successfully be just friends or whether we need or want the sex to sustain the bond.  So we have mutually agreed to try “an experiment” (his words) to see what happens.

I think this is actually kind of important.  Well, really important.  Because we kind of started off with sex, the real friend-making things kind of became secondary.  I like to think we can be friends for real.  I hope we can.  Especially if he’s okay scaling back the assholery without feeling like he has to walk on eggshells around me.  Like I told him, I don’t want to be a high-maintenance friend.  So anyway.  We’ll see.  Maybe we become great friends and decide that’s all we need or want from each other.  Maybe we become great friends and decide sex would make it even better.  Maybe we are just casual friends and that’s it.  Maybe one of us feels one way and the other feels another.  I feel like I should be writing this up like a 9th grade science lab experiment:

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Date:  February 10, 2012

Question:  Can SMF and m E cut out the physical/sexual part of their relationship and still remain friends & develop their friendship?

Materials:  SMF, m E

Hypothesis:  and here’s where I get stuck. it’s so hard to guess!

*ahem*

Hypothesis:  It might be strange at first not to cuddle or put our arms around each other, but ultimately I expect SMF and m E will both feel a lot less stress and be able to enjoy each other’s company more comfortably without the gravity of sexual tension weighing them down.

——-

Commence experiment!

 

unintended bonus: I can stop trimming my pubes again! freedom! *^-^*

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